When we talk about screenwriting, the conversation usually circles around structure, formatting, strong first pages, character arcs, or the hero’s journey. And rightly so — the craft matters. But there’s another side to this industry that doesn’t get nearly enough airtime.
Relationship building.
Yes, that phrase can set off alarm bells. It might conjure up images of fake smiles, red carpet schmoozing, and hollow praise tossed around on talk shows. But we’re not talking about flattery or forced networking. We’re talking about building real, human connections in an industry built on collaboration.
Because here’s the truth: no matter how good your script is, it doesn’t exist in a vacuum. You need people to believe in it. To read it. Champion it. Fund it. Make it. And that only happens when you build genuine relationships, not transactional ones.
Writers, Step Out of the Room
Let’s face it: writers often prefer to be alone with their thoughts. Many of us feel most at home with a blank page and a coffee-stained desk. But movies, shows, and even short films don’t come to life in solitude. They’re made by teams. And if you want to turn your writing into a profession, that means stepping out of your writing cave and into the room (or the Zoom).
That doesn’t mean pitching to every industry name you bump into with, “Hey, wanna read my script?” That’s not relationship building. That’s ambushing.
Instead, here are eight real-world, battle-tested principles to build authentic relationships in the screen industry:
1. Nobody Owes You Anything
Harsh? Maybe. But true. Passion is important, but it’s not currency. That big-name producer you’re eyeing likely gets approached constantly. When you ask them to read your script, you’re not just asking for a favour. You’re asking for hours of their time and emotional energy, and often, for them to potentially deliver a hard truth.
So be gracious. Be realistic. And above all, be mindful.
2. What’s In It For Them?
This isn’t about manipulation. It’s about connection. If you’re asking someone to invest in your story, why should they care? Maybe it speaks to something personal for them. Maybe it taps into a cause they champion or a genre they adore.
A writer once got his baseball film produced simply because he discovered the producer was a baseball fanatic. It wasn’t about profit. It was about passion. That’s the kind of alignment that opens doors.
3. You Only Get One Shot (Sometimes)
Every meeting, every email, every chance encounter should be treated with care. That junior exec you brushed off five years ago might be running the show now. Relationships evolve, but burned bridges rarely rebuild themselves.
So don’t ghost people. Don’t assume they’re not worth your time. You never know who they’ll become, or who they already are.
4. Drop the Flattery — Be Real
People in this industry can spot fake praise from a mile away. Don’t butter someone up just to get on their good side. If you genuinely admire their work, tell them. But keep it honest, brief, and specific. No fawning.
Be direct. Be human. Treat them like a person.
5. Give Something Back
If someone reads your script or gives you advice, thank them. Even if the feedback stings. Even if they pass. That kind of generosity should be acknowledged.
Gratitude builds trust. Entitlement burns it.
6. You Don’t Have to Be a Networking Ninja
You don’t need to master the art of the pitch or become some smooth-talking sales whiz. Just be friendly. Ask questions. Listen. Make casual conversation.
Most importantly, show up with genuine curiosity. Everyone has a story. Ask about theirs.
7. Take Your Time
Real relationships don’t form overnight. If you come in with an agenda, people will feel it. Let things grow naturally. Trust takes time.
Push too hard, and people will pull away. But if you show up consistently, contribute meaningfully, and play the long game, that’s how trust is built.
8. You Never Know Who You’re Talking To
Today’s assistant might be tomorrow’s showrunner. The quiet person at the workshop might be a festival judge next year. Or the casting director for your next big opportunity.
Treat everyone with respect, not because they might help you someday, but because it’s the right thing to do. And because this business has a long memory.
Final Thoughts
Craft will always matter. Your screenplay is your product. But without relationships, your work may never leave your laptop.
Building real, authentic relationships in this industry isn’t about flattery or strategy. It’s about being curious, kind, and patient. It’s about showing up, giving back, and remembering that behind every opportunity is a person with their own dreams, fears, and passions.
So keep writing. Keep refining. But also, keep connecting.
Because in the long run, it’s not just what you write. It’s who you know, and more importantly, who knows you, trusts you, and wants to work with you.
Acting
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